[Enter Lafew and Bertram.]
LAFEW

But I hope your lordship thinks not him a soldier.

BERTRAM

Yes, my lord, and of very valiant approof.

LAFEW

You have it from his own deliverance.

BERTRAM

And by other warranted testimony.

LAFEW

Then my dial goes not true; I took this lark for a bunting.

BERTRAM

I do assure you, my lord, he is very great in knowledge, and accordingly valiant.

LAFEW

I have, then, sinned against his experience and transgressed against his valour; and my state that way is dangerous, since I cannot yet find in my heart to repent. Here he comes; I pray you make us friends; I will pursue the amity.

[Enter Parolles.]
PAROLLES

[To Bertram.] These things shall be done, sir.

LAFEW

Pray you, sir, who’s his tailor?

PAROLLES

Sir!

LAFEW

O, I know him well, I, sir; he, sir, is a good workman, a very good tailor.

BERTRAM

[Aside to Parolles.] Is she gone to the king?

PAROLLES

She is.

BERTRAM

Will she away tonight?

PAROLLES

As you’ll have her.

BERTRAM
I have writ my letters, casketed my treasure,
Given order for our horses; and tonight,
When I should take possession of the bride,
End ere I do begin.
LAFEW

A good traveller is something at the latter end of a dinner; but one that lies three-thirds and uses a known truth to pass a thousand nothings with, should be once heard and thrice beaten.— God save you, Captain.

BERTRAM

Is there any unkindness between my lord and you, monsieur?

PAROLLES

I know not how I have deserved to run into my lord’s displeasure.

LAFEW

You have made shift to run into ’t, boots and spurs and all, like him that leapt into the custard; and out of it you’ll run again, rather than suffer question for your residence.

BERTRAM

It may be you have mistaken him, my lord.

LAFEW

And shall do so ever, though I took him at his prayers. Fare you well, my lord; and believe this of me, there can be no kernal in this light nut; the soul of this man is his clothes; trust him not in matter of heavy consequence; I have kept of them tame, and know their natures. Farewell, monsieur; I have spoken better of you than you have or will to deserve at my hand; but we must do good against evil.

[Exit.]
PAROLLES

An idle lord, I swear.

BERTRAM

I think so.

PAROLLES

Why, do you not know him?

BERTRAM
Yes, I do know him well; and common speech
Gives him a worthy pass. Here comes my clog.
[Enter Helena.]
HELENA
I have, sir, as I was commanded from you,
Spoke with the king, and have procur’d his leave
For present parting; only he desires
Some private speech with you.
BERTRAM
I shall obey his will.
You must not marvel, Helen, at my course,
Which holds not colour with the time, nor does
The ministration and required office
On my particular. Prepared I was not
For such a business; therefore am I found
So much unsettled: this drives me to entreat you;
That presently you take your way for home,
And rather muse than ask why I entreat you:
For my respects are better than they seem;
And my appointments have in them a need
Greater than shows itself at the first view
To you that know them not. This to my mother.
[Giving a letter.]

’Twill be two days ere I shall see you; so I leave you to your wisdom.

HELENA
Sir, I can nothing say
But that I am your most obedient servant.
BERTRAM

Come, come, no more of that.

HELENA
And ever shall
With true observance seek to eke out that
Wherein toward me my homely stars have fail’d
To equal my great fortune.
BERTRAM
Let that go.
My haste is very great. Farewell; hie home.
HELENA

Pray, sir, your pardon.

BERTRAM

Well, what would you say?

HELENA
I am not worthy of the wealth I owe;
Nor dare I say ’tis mine, and yet it is;
But, like a timorous thief, most fain would steal
What law does vouch mine own.
BERTRAM

What would you have?

HELENA
Something; and scarce so much; nothing indeed.
I would not tell you what I would, my lord. Faith, yes,
Strangers and foes do sunder and not kiss.
BERTRAM

I pray you, stay not, but in haste to horse.

HELENA
I shall not break your bidding, good my lord.
Where are my other men, monsieur?
Farewell,
[Exit Helena.]
BERTRAM
Go thou toward home, where I will never come
Whilst I can shake my sword or hear the drum.
Away, and for our flight.
PAROLLES

Bravely, coragio!

[Exeunt.]